Jesucita Rey (00:00.662)
Hey there, it's Jesucita Rey, and today we are going to be talking about you getting very, very comfortable in one of the greatest things in the world, which is you being alone.

A lot of times in this world we don't like being alone. As humans, you know, we want to connect with other humans and that's fine and that's, you know, that's what humans are. But being alone is going to be one of the greatest superpowers you will ever fucking have in your life. Being capable of sitting with yourself and figuring shit out about yourself.

and getting shit done that needs to get done in order to drive you forward to that life that you want is so very precious. Also, being alone with yourself also gives you a great peace when you finally can figure out how to handle being alone. Being alone is amazing, but at the very beginning,

usually of life. It's really, really difficult. As children, it's not. As children, a lot of us, you know, are alone a lot, especially if you're an only child or whatnot. My entire childhood, we lived out in the country and the people that I went to school with, you know, I couldn't go over there because I lived far away. And it gave me a great

imagination because I had to figure out how to play it, you know, with my toys alone or games alone and it gave me an amazing imagination to be able to be alone.

Jesucita Rey (01:53.966)
And as I got older though, when you get in your teenage years and whatnot, there always, there's that need for that connection with your peers, with your friends. There's a need to be with people your own age and to learn about life from other people. When that happens though, we end up, as we get older, always needing to have something around. So we always need to have, especially in today's day and age, you know,

When we're alone and it's silent, we don't really know what to do. We don't really like it. It bugs us, you know? So we'll jump on our phones and we'll jump on social media or we'll turn the TV on in the background and or we'll call someone because we need that noise. We need to hear that noise instead of sitting with ourselves and actually figuring out who we are and doing some real work on ourselves. Like...

taking control, like I always say, of everything about you, the good, the bad, the ugly, the beautiful. Being alone is when you figure those things out, when you figure everything out about yourself that you need to take control of, that you need to be responsible for, okay? Like I've said in previous episodes, I was into drugs, I smoked cigarettes, I drank alcohol. I have...

done some seriously bad things in my life and some seriously good things in my life as well but I had to sit with myself in a very alone state to be able to take control of everything that has gone on in my life to be able to reflect and figure out who the fuck I really am and who the fuck I want to be who I want to grow to be

I had to do that in an alone state. And my beautiful ladies, that is going to be something that you at some point in time are going to have to come to terms with. That you're going to need to actually sit with yourself. Sit with all of your past trauma, all of the bullshit that you ever had to go through, all of the things that you have suffered through and survived.

Jesucita Rey (04:15.166)
I mean, think about that. You have survived these things and although they be painful, although it be suffering and agony, you still made it through it. All of the bad that you've done, all the people that you've wronged, all of the good things that you've done, all of the sadness that you've endured, that is all sitting inside you. And when you are alone with yourself, you can actually begin to process those things and start

relieving yourself of the trauma of the harshness of the weight that puts on you every single day.

It also helps you when you are alone with yourself to get fucking shit done, to get the work in that you need to do. Don't tell everybody your dreams and what you're gonna do. They're gonna shit on them. And I swear to you, you may have some positive people in your life, but not all of them are gonna be in your corner. Not all of them are gonna try and move you forward, okay? So a lot of times being alone also means getting the shit done that needs to get done, moving that step.

further and further to get to the life that you're looking for yourself. Trying to get there, trying to move every single day to get you there. Being alone helps you do that rather than having people in your ear all the time or the negativity that comes off of social media and the time that you are wasting having to have all of this noise in the world around you because you can't handle being alone.

You know, I know a lot of people who actually ended up in relationships with people because they were terrified of being alone and they hated the relationship but they couldn't stand the person they were in the relationship with. And they got into the relationship because they couldn't handle being alone.

Jesucita Rey (06:14.434)
The number one factor in life is that you're going to have to learn to love yourself first before you love anybody else. Because if you don't love yourself first, nobody else is going to be able to love you because you haven't done the work on yourself. You haven't sat with yourself alone and figured out you are your best fucking friend. You are the person who's going to love you the most. You are the person who's in charge of your happiness. It's no one else. It's just you. And you have to be...

Good with that. I mean, that should really set a fire under your ass of, I'm in charge of my own happiness. I'm in charge of my own life. I'm in charge of taking control and taking responsibility for everything. Well, how do you figure that out when you're alone? You figure that out when you're alone. You don't figure that out when you've got somebody else's bullshit just drumming in your ears.

That's not when you learn that. You learn it when you're sitting there alone and you come to realize you came into this world alone. You're gonna leave this world alone too. You need to start being okay with being alone. Going out there and getting shit done. Going out there and making the life that you want for yourself. The life that you deserve when you put the work in. Nobody's gonna hand it to you. Nobody's gonna be there to save you. Nobody's coming to help you. It's you.

But you are a warrior. You are getting the tools to build, you know, the armor that you need in order to survive and to succeed in this world. You are that strong. You're getting the tools. That's how we build ourselves up. That's how we are capable is by learning, is by figuring out the best avenue for us. And when we fail and we fall down, getting our asses back up and realizing that failure

was just a learning experience. I have to learn something from that failure. Okay? So, life is gonna knock you down. Bad shit's gonna happen, good shit's gonna happen, there's gonna be a huge ebb and flow. And you need to be prepared for that. And how do you get prepared for that?

Jesucita Rey (08:27.574)
by being alone, by getting used to who you are, taking responsibility for those things, listening to that voice in your head and stopping the negative that's constantly turning over in your head and change that shit to a positive, to always it being a learning experience. Is bad shit gonna happen? Yeah, bad shit's gonna happen. Bad shit always happens. That's life. That's how it's gonna run. But when you are alone with yourself, you have the options of working on yourself to better yourself.

And then you also have the options of getting the shit done that needs to get done in order to make your life the amazing, amazing masterpiece that you want it to be. You want an amazing life, right? You don't want a shitty life. You don't want to fucking be broke all the time. You don't want to be fucking fighting with your significant other or, you know, constantly low and depressed and feeling awful and everything sucks and oh, is me. You don't want that kind of life for yourself.

And it doesn't matter what age you are, change is always capable. You can always change the circumstances of your life. But what's it gonna take? What do I tell you on every single episode that it's gonna take? It's gonna take repetition. It's gonna take one step in front of the other every single day until you get there. And then once you get there, you're gonna make new goals and there's gonna be new steps. And I don't care how small the steps are. The steps can be minuscule and tiny.

It doesn't matter as long as you are moving forward. And the best way to be able to do that is getting comfortable with being alone. You don't want to have to be dependent on the outside world in order to motivate you or to have the, no, to be able to move you forward. Okay. You don't want to wait for the outside world to do that because they will let you down. It's only you who has to have the discipline.

to move forward every single day, to not be stagnant, to not stay in the same shitty place that you hate being in right now, okay? It's entirely in your control. It is entirely up to you. It has always been up to you. One foot in front of the other every single day. I know it's a struggle.

Jesucita Rey (10:52.85)
I know it's a struggle for lots of us. I know there's shit going on in your life where you're like, you know what, I just don't got this. I don't got this, but you do. You are here. You've still got this. And like I said, it doesn't matter how minuscule the step is. It doesn't matter. But you need to start doing some of the work alone. You need to start coming to realize that, and I know people think that it's fucking hokey and I don't care, but you've got to understand self-love.

self-acceptance. Have you fucked up in life? Yes, everybody has. Everybody's fucked up in life. Everybody has some sort of regret in their life. You keep moving forward. You keep building yourself up and understand that everybody has those shitty moments. You just get up. You keep moving, no matter how small. But the most amount of work you're ever going to do in your life is going to be you doing it alone. You listening.

to your own voice and turning that negative voice inside your head into positive, into a learning experience, into, oh shit, this was fucked up. Oh, I gotta learn from that. I gotta learn from that. I gotta keep moving. I don't have time to stop. I have one life and I have no idea when I'm gonna die. So I better get this shit done and I better get it done now.

Jesucita Rey (12:12.566)
Being alone is going to be one of your greatest gifts. You need to embrace being alone, doing the work, taking control and responsibility for who you are and getting the work done and doing the steps to get to the life that you want. Like I said, don't listen to the outside world. Don't listen to the outside world because eventually even if they're rooting you on right now, eventually they will not and you will be left alone and at that time you will be scared.

Because you won't know what to do because you've never been alone with yourself. You've never been alone to figure out exactly who you are, exactly what you want, exactly where you want to go.

You are going to be your best friend. There is seriously a need for self love. You need to love yourself more than anybody else in this world is going to love you. That's what's going to make you strong. That is one of the things that is going to help you through this life, especially during the shitty times. As always, I am in your corner. I am here.

as a voice to tell you that somebody believes in you, somebody knows that you can do it, even when everybody else tells you that you're a fuck up and you can't. You're not. Don't listen to those types of labels on you. You are strong and amazing and wonderful, and you're gonna continue to grow and continue to strive to have the life that you want. Don't let anybody stop you. Don't listen to anybody.

who's not in your corner, who's telling you that you can do this, okay? Don't listen to the outside world. Find the positive in the world and start listening to that. Start listening to that over and over and over again until your own voice inside your head starts flipping that switch and starts saying, okay, I'm thinking positive. I know that everything in life is a learning experience. I've got this, I can do this.

Jesucita Rey (14:15.838)
You do have this. You are strong enough, even if you don't think you are right now. You are so capable of building the life that you want. I cannot express to you enough how fucking capable you are, girl. You are capable. You are strong. You are beautiful. You are wonderful. Don't let anybody stop you. I'll see you on the next episode.